So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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