He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Randomize
