it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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