I just saw a hot homeless man
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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