It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
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I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
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Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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