He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
