I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
