just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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