You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
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