Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
3pm strippers are depressing
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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