Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
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