My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize