Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
