and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
