Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
