Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
