so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I am naked and annoyed.