Texts From Last Night

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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw

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  (856): I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw http://tfl.nu/7ysm
  Replies (9) Good night (996) Bad night (2198) Order T-Shirt
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Win!

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  (334): I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender. (205): Win! http://tfl.nu/0n6n
  Replies (12) Good night (5111) Bad night (641)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not

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  (937): Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not http://tfl.nu/mdp5
  Replies (27) Good night (536) Bad night (2520) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.

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  (703): one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day. http://tfl.nu/f2q9
  Replies (16) Good night (1296) Bad night (3364) Order T-Shirt
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  (650): View more from California

  I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.

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  (650): I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'. http://tfl.nu/1o2s
  Replies (18) Good night (849) Bad night (2784) Order T-Shirt
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this

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  (304): enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this http://tfl.nu/89bx
  Replies (18) Good night (3873) Bad night (489) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner

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  (330): I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner http://tfl.nu/m02y
  Replies (7) Good night (1880) Bad night (1161) Order T-Shirt
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...

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  (616): I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am... http://tfl.nu/z53a
  Replies (18) Good night (1529) Bad night (519) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)

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  (973): St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition) http://tfl.nu/fbpq
  Replies (3) Good night (1481) Bad night (386)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame

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  (516): Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame http://tfl.nu/dqi5
  Replies (2) Good night (1607) Bad night (364) Order T-Shirt
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.

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  (814): He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice. http://tfl.nu/r5ev
  Replies (10) Good night (475) Bad night (1117) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.

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  (415): Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often. http://tfl.nu/cpju
  Replies (4) Good night (713) Bad night (441) Order T-Shirt
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.

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  (618): You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there. http://tfl.nu/4ob2
  Replies (6) Good night (822) Bad night (410) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.

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  (505): Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot. http://tfl.nu/8yik
  Replies (3) Good night (471) Bad night (191) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.

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  (818): The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink. http://tfl.nu/7x1a
  Replies (2) Good night (208) Bad night (570)

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