Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
