I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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