I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
