remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
