He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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