I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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