is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
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