ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
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