C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
So. Much. Porn.
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