See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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