the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
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