and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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