He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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