after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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