dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize