Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
