are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I need to align my fucking chakras
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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