is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I am spending my child support on dildos
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Can I color on your dick again?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
