I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
