apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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