Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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