do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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