dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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