My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize