Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
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During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
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Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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