She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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