Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
