using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
