WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
