I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Just puked most of my soul out..
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
