Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
