Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
