...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
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Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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