do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Floor bacon is actually really good
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
