My room smells like vodka and shame
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
