OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
